My Single Life Part One


So I think your all enjoying me talk more openly about my life to date and one area of my life thats never really gone to plan is my love life. I wouldn't usually write about this subject as its something no one really wants to talk about but here goes.....


As a little girl I would dream about the 2.4 children life I would play outside around the corner of our house in the garden and plan out my imaginary kitchen which went as far as me picking the colour of the tiles (I was destined for a creative career) I had an imaginary husband called Ben and we had two children. I think thats about as detailed as it got but it was something I thought about often. Those dreams were shattered as soon as I went to my all girls secondary school where I had frizzy hair, a very short fringe on a very long forehead and I had to wear a below the knee kilt with pin and matching shirt. As you can imagine the fashionista in me wanted to burn it but the geek in me abided by the rules and said good bye to any chance of meeting boys!!

Not only was the outfit and hair bad on top of it all I had acne the kind of acne which gathered in clusters across my face... on my cheeks, forehead and chin. Now you would of thought mum would of let me have a long fringe to hide my sore looking skin instead she happily let the hairdresser hack away at my very thick hair like you would with those kids in the 70's with a bowl on your head basically that was the result I ended up with. Im painting a 'ugly betty' version of myself but i'm sure many of you will have similar stories if you do please tell me in comments box below so I can perish in the fact that i'm not alone here!
Today girls seem to look flawless from the age of well lets say birth as they never seem to look like my generation did growing up. I think maybe its all the You Tube tutorials and contouring that have blown those 'geek days' right out the water



Right so meeting boys at school was a washout for me but to be fair there wasn't really any time for boys after school either as I was at nan & grandads or home doing homework or occasionally out on my bike. Then came college, I left school after my GCSE's I didn't want to be in that kilt any longer I wanted to be a fashion designer and wear what ever colourful outfit I could find. The only place for a good start in the fashion industry was at the esteemed 'The London College of Fashion' so I applied for a BTEC corse they only took 60 applicants on and luckily I was one of those few!

You think i'm going to tell you that my college days gave me better luck with meeting boys aren't you, sorry guys my luck in love was still non-existant as everyone here was either a girl or a gay - Oh there was a set of life drawing classes where we got to draw a naked man for a few weeks but staring at his willy and having to draw it didn't do much for my desire to have a boyfriend if anything it turned me off! 

My first interview at college was one to remember though, me and mum made our way to London on September 11th I know what a pionient day and we were none the wiser to the events that were about to unfold. We watched the terror attack on the way home on a TV through a stores window on Oxford Street and we couldn't believe our eyes. Once I got into the corse this attack made me question my choices for training in London but I didn't want anything stop me in my path to becoming a fashionista. So I braved the tube everyday, held my breath and hoped for the best amid a few anxiety attacks along the way I made it out the other side. Any how back to the story, so its September 11th morning we’re all sat in a large room which felt like a school hall and smelt like one too. When this handsome boy walked in he was the most stylish boy i'd ever seen but his shoes were what really got my attention. shiny, patent, black, pointy, with waxed laces tied in cute little bows, his hair was blonde and waxed into perfect Justin Timberlake spikes and he styled it with a suit jacket and skinny jeans. I'd never seen such a smart dressed boy as from where I hung most of the boys wore Umbro & Reebok tracksuits we gave him the name 'shiny shoe boy'. He taught me a lot about how a first impression really counts and making an effort never goes out of fashion. That look also became one that many men rocked over the next few years changing the face of mens fashion!

So here I am at LCF training my arse off to become the next Vivienne Westwood, meeting great people who all had their individual talents and in the back of my mind i'm thinking 'where is he because he's not at this college'. It’s like ive spent most of my life in certain places wondering where the love of my life is. He definetly wasn't at LCF nor was he at ‘University of The Creative Arts’ which I attended after college and was there for another 3 years. I didn't end up living in Rochester I commuted from home, which was also what all my friends were doing this meant that we got the chance to spend some of our weekend jobs pay checks on clubbing in London. My favourite club was ‘Trap’ we absolutely loved going here mainly so we could channel our creative talents into our outfits. Im going to have to dig out some looks as they were pretty special to say the least haha!

So were in this wicked club dressed up to the 9's and there’s hot men EVERYWHERE when I say everywhere I mean everywhere... me and the girls had a code phrase for when we saw a hot man the one that always got us crying with laughter was 'he walks a little he toddles along' I can just see us now giggling like a bunch of school girls. I mentioned my 'ugly betty' phase at school and I can clarify it didn't get much better in my early 20's, noted the frizzy hair had gone as thank the lord GHD'S had been invented genius, but the spots were still there. We were fashion students and having that title meant that we get the acceptance that we can wear what every the hell we wanted too and that we did. Many of them looks could of given Madonna a run for her money and i'm 100% sure looking back they scared the men off!!

One think i've really learnt from my 20's is even though there wasn't much luck in love with no one that really made an impact in a way that I think true love does I do think I dedicated those years to friendship, lots of laughter and learning valuable life lessons. 



I won’t devour my late 20,S & early 30’S just yet I’ll add those to my next post but what I will say if your looking for love, stop looking as I’ve spent most of my time doing just that and totally forgetting how much fun I’ve had just being me. There’s always time for love but you can’t get back those early years figuring out who you really are.... 

In the words of Carrie Bradshaw 'your 20's are for having fun, your 30's are to learn the lessons and your 40's are to pay for the drinks' 

Cheers To That!  


ripped jeans - bershka

red swim costume (similar to the one i'm wearing as mine have sold out) - Calvin Klein

trainers (similar to the one i'm wearing as mine have sold out) - ASH

round sunglasses - (similar to the one i'm wearing as mine have sold out) rayban

Gemma Bishop1 Comment