How Did I Get Here?


Lately I’m feeling to talk to you all about my life, I spoke about how I'm struggling to blog regularly in my last post 'Am I Being Too Ambitious'  which touched on me working a full time job plus kicking of 'the Edit' blog. What I haven't told you is how much i'm personally getting from creating these blog posts they are literally 'giving me life'. As blogs today basically are online diaries I feel like me putting ‘finger to keyboard’ and talking about such subjects is empowering me and I’m really hoping inspiring one of you to Be you too....

So how did I get here? That is a question i've asked myself many times and the only answer I can give is that i've just done what I felt right at the time. I’ve never made a life plan, never seen myself at a certain age doing a certain job, I’ve just gone with the path that’s been given to me and worked my arse off in the process. I’ve always known I’d have a career in fashion but I thought it would a designer or an artist 'a modern day Picasso' or something like that haha. It all started on a holiday to our villa in Nerca Spain when I was around 5 I left all my coloured crayons on the back shelf of the “hire car” on a very hot spainish day you can just imagine what happened next. We all returned too a multicoloured rainbow parcel shelf, I personally loved it but mum and dad however weren’t so impressed!!

From that day on I was an artist in the making and nan and grandad encouraged those skills the most. Buying me every type of colouring in set and painting kit they could find and sending me on art corses to express myself and grow my skills.... which Im sure you can imagine I ran wild with. I even invented a clothing brand which I called 'Blueshay' not something id go for today but the 11 year old me thought 'blueshay' would be big business!



This is a tough subject for me and something I've not openly talked about apart from with closer friends but my family life has been one of a challenge over the past 10 years. One part which was emotionally hard was losing grandad around 4 years ago, a man I can only describe as utterly incredible in every way, he adored my nan and gave us all so much love I could cry writing these words. If you've ever been lucky enough to have someone like this in your life you'll know exactly what I mean when I say loosing him was devastating.  He took us all over the world on family holidays to some of the most stunning locations which I can now only dream about returning too but one day I hope I will. He showed us that life is about family, spending time together, boundless amounts of love and most importantly being happy with what you have living in the now.

When me and my sister Amy were at school he would pick us up 3 days a week after school and take us to their house where nan would make us the best food and we would play in the garden, annex house (which was our great nan's house but we saw it as our house) down by the pond or 'the dingly dell' as nan & grandad would call it, we would play until mum collected us after work. Being a teenager I went through those stages of not wanting grandad to wait directly outside the school gates when he collected us as this was where all the cool kids hung as it lowered my street cred... mum had to tell grandad to wait further down the road and not to get out the car and walk up to the gates!! I cringe now thinking back to my teenage self so worried about what everyone else thought, today Id give anything for grandad to pick me up so we could have our chats home. 

Him and my nan meet at work where grandad was a scientist and nan was his PA. They had a love which I feel was the most real and honest i've ever come across (i'm getting teary again maybe its because I'm finally writing this down) They not only worked together but got to travel the world together they visited many places some include Hong Kong and New York. Eventually grandad started his own business and was very successful, he invented a type of lens which was used worldwide and still is today. My older self would now ask him more questions about business but my younger self just wanted to play with grandad and comb/trim his very minimal hair at the pretend barbers me and Ames invented!

As for our nan Lucy or Lou Lou as grandad would call her, nan is still here and we are so luck to have her she is the strongest women I've ever met she's been through so many illness one including breast cancer in her 80's which she fought head on. Though she's not as able as before her mind and sense of hummor is still as on point as ever and she makes us smile with her positive outlook on life.
I love spending every moment I can with nan being with her makes life worth living :)



They shaped our childhood and made it as perfect as they could, inspiring me and my sister to be what ever we wanted to be. I feel so lucky that I got as much time with grandad as I did and from that I have so many amazing memories of him and our adventures. One area I feel is truely dedicated to them both is my love of painting I know its a cliche a creative person who likes to paint I can see your eyes rolling now ;) But I do, I absolutely love it if I had my way i'd sit in the garden all summer long painting what ever comes into my head, well pianting and blogging, one day paint, next day style & blog and so on - true professional me haha

Nan & Grandad started their business late into their 30's which proved to me that if you honestly believe you can do it you really can. 

So finally in the words of our grandad Bernard "go get em kiddo".....



white hoodie - victoria secrets

denim shorts - zara

trainer socks - calvin klein

dad trainers - kooples

round sunglasses - coach